So my husband and I always do something for each other for Mother's Day/Father's Day. A co-worker once asked me why since my husband isn't my father.
I see his point. I guess I started out because my children were babies and as if out of habit, when they couldn't do something I did it for them. Being a parent is hard and it seemed a shame to let my husband remain empty-handed on Father's Day while I pointed out the fact that he wasn't my father and to see with the babies.
Now that my kids are older I guess I should stop but at the end of the day, if Father's Day is about celebrating the contribution that fathers make to the lives of their children, I would argue that nobody understands the particular challenges that our children pose as me. I would also argue that nobody appreciates my husband's contribution as a father as much as me. Some would say my kids do but let's be honest, my kids should but they don't. Everything we do for them is "normal" like the rising of the sun.
And on this particular Father's Day after more than 3 months without school or day care, I get how particuarly challenging being a parent has been. How much patience and self restraint was required.
So after I conjoled the children to scribbling out a card (it took them 5 minutes) I prepared a homemade brunch consisting of mimosa, soymilk banana pancakes, patatoes, eggs, bacon, and specoloos cheesecake bars (my kids took the pancakes and most of the bacon and syrup and ate it while watching t.v. - Letting them watch t.v. was the only way I could get them to say Happy Father's Day). Afterwards I watched the kids so my husband could have some time to himself. When it got hard and my self-lessness started to wane with persistant thoughts of of "Why am I doing this, he's not my father", I reminded myself that without my husband's contribution as a father it would always be like this for me.
In the end it wasn't all bad as I was able to succesfully torture my husband with an English/French/Japanese clue to his gift:
It wasn't all about torture. Amist all the figuring out school/day care and getting ready for school/day care the gift won't be arriving any time soon. I was hoping it would take him that that long to figure it out.
I see his point. I guess I started out because my children were babies and as if out of habit, when they couldn't do something I did it for them. Being a parent is hard and it seemed a shame to let my husband remain empty-handed on Father's Day while I pointed out the fact that he wasn't my father and to see with the babies.
Now that my kids are older I guess I should stop but at the end of the day, if Father's Day is about celebrating the contribution that fathers make to the lives of their children, I would argue that nobody understands the particular challenges that our children pose as me. I would also argue that nobody appreciates my husband's contribution as a father as much as me. Some would say my kids do but let's be honest, my kids should but they don't. Everything we do for them is "normal" like the rising of the sun.
And on this particular Father's Day after more than 3 months without school or day care, I get how particuarly challenging being a parent has been. How much patience and self restraint was required.
So after I conjoled the children to scribbling out a card (it took them 5 minutes) I prepared a homemade brunch consisting of mimosa, soymilk banana pancakes, patatoes, eggs, bacon, and specoloos cheesecake bars (my kids took the pancakes and most of the bacon and syrup and ate it while watching t.v. - Letting them watch t.v. was the only way I could get them to say Happy Father's Day). Afterwards I watched the kids so my husband could have some time to himself. When it got hard and my self-lessness started to wane with persistant thoughts of of "Why am I doing this, he's not my father", I reminded myself that without my husband's contribution as a father it would always be like this for me.
In the end it wasn't all bad as I was able to succesfully torture my husband with an English/French/Japanese clue to his gift:
It wasn't all about torture. Amist all the figuring out school/day care and getting ready for school/day care the gift won't be arriving any time soon. I was hoping it would take him that that long to figure it out.
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